The Christmas Post

And so it came to pass that one Emmanuel Joseph survived another Christmas without major financial bankruptcy,baking burns,alcohol poisioning or vicious overeating.And it also came to pass, as per the Will of God that this year, he would find himself his soulmate, get a career going, and have much love from his family and friends that he feels extremely blessed.

And so this one Emmanuel Joseph decided to spend some of his year end bonus on Christmas shopping.No wait, let me rephrase that- a chunk of his bonus.So he drags up two good friends of his ... Pravin (Lamp post/ Pogo Stick/Menara KL) and Chin Leong (recovering alcoholic/crossdresser/wannabe Jessie Chung).The third would not fit into the Kancil, or there would be no space to carry back stuff.

And so they visit the friendly neighbourhood Tesco to shop.Oddly, there were not many cars (even though it was the 23rd and should be packed to the brim with people with money, who buy stuff, and holiday onlookers, who are just there for the free air con).So in goes the trio looking for a Christmas tree, decorations, a DVD player,Christmas gifts, wine, beer,and remaining stuff for baking, and starting with the Christmas tree, Emmanuel realizes he cannot seem to find any damn tree or decor for sale.This is the second time he is feeling pissed because of a Christmas tree.The week before, he visits Jusco just to find a huge 20 feet tree for display and only 4 feet trees for sale.

And the Lamp Post wants to take a look at fitness stuff, and suddenly we see the tree and decor being sold there.I mean WTF?Since when does Christmas trees end up in the fitness section.Never mind....we grab the tallest tree on sale (coz I am tired of trees below my height in my house- we might as well decorate a Bonsai)

And after this great tree discovery, he walks around up and down deciding on which drinks to buy for Christmas, till Lamp Post and Crossdresser gets a bit cheesed off la.Then we realize there are no Christmas songs playing in Tesco.Great.They've killed Jesus.

About one hour later, we met this dude we have not seen in a few years.Here's the thing with me- I do not see the point in 'Hi' and 'Hello' when you meet and old acquaintance.To me we are better of walking and ignoring each other.In fact, that would be the polite thing to do.

Coz otherwise all we'll be doing is lie.We meet someone we have not seen in aeons, perhaps we cannot remember their name in mamak, and we exchange name cards, smile, recall the one or two things we remember about the person and ask them about that thing (e.g. we only recall that the guy has a cute sister, a chihuahua or a huge porn collection) and go "Oh, how is your sister?"(reply: "She's underwent a sex change and now lives with a gay transvestite lumberjack called Tom") or "How is your dog" (reply :" She's dead, sodomized by a gay transvestite called Tom") or "Hey you still have those porn CDs" (reply : "no, Tom stole them coz my sister could not please him enough")

Then we laugh and ultra fake laugh and promise to keep in touch.Two weeks later, we meet the same person and go "Hey how are you?You still in (insert name of college/workplace/housing estate here)"....so its so damn fake.A proper honest conversation would be something like this

Person A: Hi, you look familiar but you are way too unimportant , insignificant, unpopular in my life, so I did not bother to know your name in high school or college.

Person B: Ha Ha, don't worry about it, you did not mean jack squat to me either.By the way, I am not interested to know where you work, or study, coz I'm gonna forget all about and only ask you about it the next time we meet.If I know someone there, I will not ask them about you, as they too are as insignificant to me as you are.If I don't know someone there,just to look popular, I will create/invent some safe names applicable to all races, like Joe, Tina, Mike and Tim and ask you if you know them.If you don't I will not be surprised as I made them up anyway.If you do, I will not be surprised, as you are a pathological liar by nature, and I will then have to make up some stuff about my fictional character, you will pretend to match them to a friend that you are pretending to have (i.e. oh is it Tina from the Chess club or the Chest club?The one with glasses or big chest?). And we will keep adding features until we come up with a completely new fictional character worthy of  The Sims

Person A: Let's exchange phone numbers and name cards now and discard them later.

Person B: OK.....Now let's promise to keep in touch and never bother, and open our phone books and wonder who the hell is this person about 6 months later.

Person A: Done.

OK Back to the Christmas post.So after meeting the unknown friend, and doing all of the above, I looked for a Christmas CD.I saw this big banner reading "Christmas Sale" in the CD section of Tesco, but when I looked, I found only ONE (1) damned Christmas CD and even that was not songs - only tunes.So yeap its official.A Christmas Sale without Christmas songs, they've killed not just Jesus but Santa Claus as well.

Disappointed at the lack of songs for sale, absence of songs playing and the fact that the Christmas tree was hidden (gee I was beginning to wonder if this was like some new Islam Hadhari concept)...I proceeded to pay the biggest single receipt bill in my life apart from electronics and my car, and was 'rewarded' with a Christmas Song - "Jingle Bells".....which leads me to believe its all a conspiracy.There's some big monitor somewhere behind the scenes in Tesco with an indicator 'Daily Christian Spending' and if the Christians of Klang spend a certain amount, Tesco is allowed to play one Christmas song.No wonder Tesco was empty.

Then we go on to Jusco were I was greeted with 'Chestnuts on an Open Fire in the rooftop carpark.Suddenly it seemed like Christmas came alive again and someone gave CPR to Santa Claus.No wonder Jusco was packed la.In Jusco realized that I look poor.Coz when I walked into Body Shop, no one but this Malay girl would layan me.Serves those arrogant Chinese girls who earns-4 bucks-an-hour-yet-looks-down-on-everyone who walks in, at last I bought 3  (pretty pricey) gifts there and the nice Malay girl got the commision....thats why do not judge a book by its cover.....even though the cover is a pair of flip flops and a pasar malam T-shirt, the guy might very well have more than your monthly salary in his wallet.Hmmph.Baka.Bought some wine as well.

Then both Pravin and Yap helped me decorate the new Christmas tree, with Yap wanting to convert to Christianity coz he found a new passion- decorating Christmas trees.So this year, we may see his Chinese New Year tree (the small pokok limau) being um, more colourful than usual.

After more galavanting, had a pleasant surprise on Christmas Eve when my colleagues came down straight from work to visit, bringing a big ass choc cake that was orgasmically yummylicious.Was really nice of them.Basically I introed them to my dad as such. "Pa, these are all my bosses, except this one" coz basically, yeah all were managers except Mathan and Syer.So all were my bosses la.

Had a lovely Christmas all in all,what more can one ask for when you have great friends, colleagues, family, and last but not least, love in your heart for someone special?

Love you all and Have a Belated Merry Christmas all my friends and those who bother reading this blog.May God grant us all his blessings for the New Year.

Oh yea, thanks Pelf for the gorgeous card! Looking forward to a New Year's in Genting this year hehee......Have a Good One all!! :)

Goodbye 2006.Hello 2007

 

 

 

 

 

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Which Tarot Card I am

Just wondered after seeing it on another blog ;).Not supposed to believe in stuff like that but hey, Stars do say me and my girl meant to be ^ ^

You are The Sun

Happiness, Content, Joy.

The meanings for the Sun are fairly simple and consistent.

Young, healthy, new, fresh. The brain is working, things that were muddled come clear, everything falls into place, and everything seems to go your way.

The Sun is ruled by the Sun, of course. This is the light that comes after the long dark night, Apollo to the Moon's Diana. A positive card, it promises you your day in the sun. Glory, gain, triumph, pleasure, truth, success. As the moon symbolized inspiration from the unconscious, from dreams, this card symbolizes discoveries made fully consciousness and wide awake. You have an understanding and enjoyment of science and math, beautifully constructed music, carefully reasoned philosophy. It is a card of intellect, clarity of mind, and feelings of youthful energy.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Possessed in MidValley

OK so you have this scenario right where a friend of yours wants to go shopping.And perhaps coz he cannot see very well in daylight, asks you to follow him and the gang.So like a kambing you follow this dudes out for an outing, knowing very well you have had NIL sleep in the last 24 hours and need to go in to work in 16 hours time.And you round and round sleepily and realize under extreme stress, Malaysians can really perform the most amazing parking stunts (Kancil squeezed in between two cars) and also the most stupid (there was this MyVi real dungu female driver who basically won the irritation of the population by parking, then reversing, then reparking, then reversing, then reparking then reversing....well you get idea).See, this is what causes road rage and throwing of objects, hypertension.showing of middle fingers, court cases and unneccesary bloodshed .

And then they terpilih this movie right, with a real powderful title like 'Possessed' and tell you its got Amber Chia in it, so its gotta rock.So in you saunter into the cinema.Wow.I have never been this stunned in my life.It was by far......the WORSE FREAKING movie I have seen.(warning: major spoilers ahead)OK, first of all the movie opens with this sipposedly gruesome scene where this girl wakes up in hospital and takes an axe (dunno from where) and proceeds to chop her doctor.The bloody pieces of flesh looked like watermelon chunks and the blood exactly like Buncho water color which I used to play with as a child.Apparently Amber lost her memory (and all acting skills) and her sister is missing.

Then they show this house , and this Malay girl who is speaking some unknown language, dubbed in Cantonese, suddenly put on a jade ring and jump down and die.Then they show Amber who looks like her fugliest ever.I remember a time I thought her lips was pretty, but in this movie it looked like she French kissed a beehive and left a few bees behind.It also looks like her body been run over by a overloaded trailer, coz her bodycut went from shape of a Ming dynasty vase to a fifty cent plastic 'Baba' flower pot.

Then there's this old dude who looks Malay, but speaks perfect dubbed Cantonese.He asks for a pipe from Amber, smokes, and promptly dies.The way he dies reminds me of the way a friend of mine got drunk in Red Box.

So apparently she lost her memory and apparently there's this real friendly ghost living in her house.This movie borrows heavily from other ghost stories.Real heavily.There's this part where they show the ghost coming out of the bath tub.Damn it wei, I feel a rubber ducky emerging from bubbles would have a more scary effect.And the ghost actually looked prettier than the living Amber Chia.First time I LOL during a supposedly killer scary scene.

Then the ghost starts getting horny and starts fucking everybody in the movie.Then this pervert appears from nowhere and its like the funnniest rape scene ever.He ties Amber up, puts duct tape over her mouth, then puts lipstick over her duct tape, mashes his face into hers, then does some silly play with some scissors, and instead of 'fei lai' her, he tickles her toes with scissors.Then he goes home and fucks a wall.Then the ghost kills him.

Just as I was wondering where the hell is the possesing part in this movie, the producers as in on queue show Amber getting possesed by watching a video of her sis.This also made me almost ROTFL.She does this headspin thing like Booker T in WWF does a spinaroony or how some rappers does a balancing act with their head and start spinning like a gasing.

Then she kills everyone and reveals that all the while the sister(Amber) did some bad things to her la.Then Amber goes mad.Then her sister somehow becomes the nurse and takes care of Amber.No I don't mean kill Amber I mean sayang her, its like WTF.A vengeful, but forgiving spirit...???

AARGH.

Request for Prayer.

Um, got a special prayer intention so my friends who are reading do pray for me ya, please (regardless of your belief system-there's only one God anyway).The intention is prety confidential la, but basically I've taken a vow to shave my head and go vegan for a hundred days, give up my morning coffee for a year, sunrise to sundown fast for 3 months,pledge a portion of my salary to charity for a year and few other things should this prayer of mine be answered.So yea, this really means a lot to me.

I do believe in the power of prayer and that if you want something bad enough , the universe itself conspires to help you get it.And to me, its for a irreplacable cause.

So do keep this intention your prayers brothers and sisters.God bless.

Thanks a million.



De profundis clamavi ad te, Domine:Domine, exaudi vocem meam:Fiant aures tuae intendentes,in vocem deprecationis meae.Si iniquitates observaveris, Domine:Domine, quis sustinebit?Quia apud te propitiatio est:et propter legem tuam sustinui te, Domine.Sustinuit anima mea in verbo eius:speravit anima mea in Domino.A custodia matutina usque ad noctem:speret Israel in Domino.Quia apud Dominum misericordia:et copiosa apud eum redemptio.Et ipse redimet Israel,ex omnibus iniquitatibus eius.Gloria Patri, et Filio,et Spiritui Sancto.Sicut erat in principio, et nunc, et semper,et in saecula saeculorum. Amen.

Note to readers (Esp dear Pelf) .....translation of above (which is actually a Latin prayer.. called De Profundis)

Out of the depths have I cried to Thee, O Lord: Lord, hear my voice. Let Thine ears be attentive to the voice of my supplication. If Thou, O Lord, shalt observe iniquities: Lord, who shall endure it? For with Thee there is merciful forgiveness: and by reason of Thy law I have waited for Thee, O Lord. My soul hath relied on His word: my soul hath hoped in the Lord. For the morning watch even until night, let Israel hope in the Lord. And He shall redeem Israel from all his iniquities.

In case blur liao, Christians and Jews see themselves as Israelites sometimes ^ ^.
This prayer is actually a Biblical verse taken from from Psalm 129.Its usually used for dead souls la (De Profundis literally translates to 'From the Depths')

But in my case I really hope for this to happen, so yea, kinda feeling in the depths right now :)Thanks sis! For the prayers.. :)

What I never wanted to be

After some chats with my dear girl,I realized that growing up I had always wanted to be this somebody la at one point or another.I went through like a plethora of 'ambitions' before ending up in a career path chosen by like 2/3rds of Malaysian students... Information Technology.

More like 5/6th of all Malaysian students la.Yea yea, Zaman Teknologi Maklumat my brown behind.

And most of the 'IT' jobs you get at Cyberjaya and Technology park would not require any form of IT professional training whatsoever, any dud would be able to answer phone calls and go 'Hello, International Global Call Center Masquarading as a Technical Specialist.My name is , but it does not matter since you're going to forget me in ten minutes anyway.If you would like to know, I hold a Masters in IT, but my job could easily be taken over by a PMR graduate,a talking dog, or a phone recorded message.

I've been job hunting before, and that was 2 years bacl, and from what I heard the market's only got tougher.Back then, job fairs would be like 80% call center jobs (HDPM-HSBC's call center) is like the biggest unemployed grad farm I've seen in my life.The Government should award Datukship to the white guy running the place.Out of the 20% remainding jobs, 5% would be programming jobs that requires the applicant to be proficient in 30 coding languages, the ability to work 22 hours a day and the patience to do it all under a salary of 1.5k per month.

5% more would be jobs that require 3 or more years experience but somehow opened a booth in a college job fair.And usually they will recommend you the call center jobs as you lack experience (they have call center openings too)

2% would be for ultra hunted positions, with 1 million applicants going for like 5 posts.And then they will make you go for blood test, eye test, IQ test, EQ test, shooting test, lie detector test, until at the end of the day you will be convinced that you are being interrogated by the CIA and your dad is related to Osama Bin Laden, and confused, you decide to join the call center to avoid detection.

Only the remaining 8% would be actual IT jobs whose advertisers are actually looking for college grads or something and willing to give you a chance la.So those lucky few who are not succumbed to the Dark Side of the earlier categories would be those who chose a Jedi Way LOL.

But back to the topic, I had always at some point of my life some burning ambition la.

Among things I wanted to be when I grew up apart from the mandatory 'doctor,lawyer,engineer,architect' (both real ambitions and fictional figments from childhood), in no particular order

-A Jesuit priest
-A Jedi librarian(OK laugh laugh...but I thought it was cool to know all the stuff in the galaxy and still kick ass with a lightsaber)
-A forensic anthropologist
-A paedatric neurologist (I remember reading somewhere they're rare)
-A military strategist
-A pilot
-A marine biologist (especially when I got fixated on deep water creatures for a season) ...yea Pelf, laugh la
-A Capuchin monk
-Electronics guru specializing in complex PCBs.
-Poisons expert (ninja movies)
-A horticulturist

And numerous others.There also things I did not want to be....but sometimes my friends assume I do due to well, alcahol influencing their thoughts or my voice or something similar.

-A towel model
-A professional clown
-A professional sushi eater (the guys who has to stuff up the last pieces of sushi from a karaoke night)
-Same as above for ice cream or anything else.
-A professional singer
-A prophet
-Jesus Christ Superstar
-A black Jesus.
- A cross between a red beetroot and a guy who thinks he's a beluga whale.
-An economist
- A UN envoy(when I suddenly launch into a volley of international goings on jibber jabber like I actually know what I am talking about- usually a few glasses of alcohol does that to people.)


well, Yap, at least I do not do an Egyptian dance or the Numa Numa la.So there.My two and a half sen worth.And I know you're reading as well (you know who you are la la...so Ai Shiteru to you too.)

What is So Different In This Relationship

Now with the clarification out of the way, would like to answer Soo, Francis, and a few other friend's question to why this relationship is so different.Especially Francis.Here goes dude.There are much more to this list, but its more mushy, I'm afraid she will go 'Piang' reading it, Tong will call and yell at me for me being a drama king,Kay will report it to my whole group and

1.I wake up in the morning with an irresistable urge to hear her voice.
2.The same urge before I go to sleep.The same every damn hour of the day.
3.Lots of stuff I wanna do for her I would not have done for myself.
4.I know she loves me back.For real.
5.I remember every minute detail about her from a year plus back.The smell of her hair when we first met.Her first words to me,and what she wore, and the same goes for every meeting in between.
6.Her smile makes me smile.
7.It does not feel like I am making any effort, it feels, natural and fitting, very correct.It just feels so right.
8.I do not want her to change.Same with her to me.
9.Our birthdates match perfectly (the highest level of compatibility in every type of horoscope, Western,Chinese,Indian, Egyptian, Hebrew.)Kinda written in the stars though I'm not supposed to believe in it la.
10.My heart tells me its right.

Clarifications and Explanations

Suddenly realized in my excitement over my new relationship, I may have painted my ex in a negative light .I'm sorry if I came across this way.

Would like to set the record straight, as those who know us both may get the wrong picture of her, I would not like that in the least.I do till now, respect her very much and think of her as a great person who will find someone more suitable for her because she deserves it.

-She did not use me, I was the one who 'fell' for her.Whatever I did, at that time, I did sincerely.
-At that point of time, I thought I was in love.
-At that point of time, I thought we were actually in a relationship.I believe so did she.Neither of us probably what a relationship was supposed to be like.
-She tried to indicate to me a few times that she was not ready etc.I was not sensitive enough to pick up signals, as I am now.
-As she put it, our relationship was highly platonic and very immature.We ended up more like a brother and sister thing.A brother and sister that celebrated Valentines.
-I'm sure neither of us was ready for a relationship and I know now it would never have worked should the situation recur under any circumstance.
-Having been in one for three years helped me learn a lot.Prepared me for a lot.Makes me appreciate what I have now a lot.

However...

-It was over before it began right?
-Truth be told, you and I both know now, what we have was not really love, right?
-I'm sorry if when we split I made you feel bad or irreplacable.There is no need to
-I believe 2 years plus is a long time.I've moved on.I believe so have you.So let's move on.Consider it a bad chapter of your life and mine.From your post I see you've found a new guy.Good for you.

Take care and wishing you the the best.

Civil Servant Pay Rise

ROTFL.That's the only damned reaction I could give when I heard on RedFM this morning that the fruitcakes form Ceupacs were asking for next year.Not that I have anything against government servants- my dad was in the government service for thirty odd years on his life, and all that, but 40%.Syeah right.Has anyone sitting on Ceupacs actually bothered to notice, our country is actually experiencing an economic dwindle at the moment.Sure, they can tell you its booming.Just like how they've convinced us that building a new capital, two freaking tall buildings that serve little more than national pride (read: urban cosmetics) , a national service program whereby our future kids will mix togather to foster national unity for three months and come out still not knowing how to properly fire a gun.Then they decide to send a spaceman into space and do groundbreaking research like how will a gasing spin in space and how does teh tarik in gravity zero taste like.

Um, if its a cultural exchange program we're looking for there's always UNESCO right?Besides I strongly doubt between collecting soil samples and soiling themselves, cosmonauts,taikonauts and astronauts have any time to layan our bolehnauts in outer space to see how their wau is drifting in outer space.

Then we have houses being converted into 'dewan orang ramai' instantly whenever people suddenly discover that taxpayers are getting hammered for 20 bucks quit rent and councillors of the State Assembly are building huge Taj Mahals on illegal ground.

And then we have an amazing delivery system whereby to increase the efficiency by 10%, the government needs to install some fancy system developed by two or three 'graduan menggangur' for RM 15k, and then hire a consulatation firm to find out what's wrong with the system which will take another 50k, and the consultation firm will recommend another proper programming company that is of course, also owned by the owner of the consultation firm, that will charge the government another 100k to write a simple HTML program.

And the justification for the pay rise, is the improvement of the delivery system.Um, since when does purchase of expensive machineries actually get attributed to effort?

I get this mental image.A stingy Singaporean businessman opens a paint factory here.And being the slavedriver he is, he whips his Bangladeshi workers to mix paint with their bare hands and they make like 20 pots a day.He then goes up to Genting, strikes a jackpot and comes down and buys a multimillion dollar machine, and suddenly his workers get much less works, but are churcning 100 pots a day.Now suddenly his workers, not only being ultimate ingrates to the businessman (who could have kept the money and get a 2nd,3rd wife or a few China dolls) instead demand a, I dunno, maybe 40% pay rise.Now does that sound correct to you?

Especially when we in the private sector also feeling the pinch of bad decisions made by our powderful ministers, like Kerisamuddin,Semi-Value, Laughidah Aziz, and Ong Ranting.

Why should we suffer alone then?

My two and a half sen.

I'm serious

To the annonymous blogger who's been bugging my life who thinks I called a bluff by saying where you were from .I think this should convince you that I can trace you.Um, yea, your time of log and your out page (comments) actually gave you out.Peace man, I just wanna live a nice life.So stop bugging my blog ya.Go bug MENJ or what la.He also happy man la now.

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Banning Annonymous Comments

That's it.A few seconds ago, another asshole posted a negative, stupid insult on my blog.I do not mind neither insults or negative comments, but just posting them to irritate me here is just irritating.Plus, unlike my other blog (under UPP) I cannot use htacess, Akismet or anything to prevent this jokers from posting crap.I re-enabled annonymous posting simply for Pelf upon her request some time back.I cannot keep deleting comments that irritate me, that is conveniently taken from some websites, coz the guy cannot learn foreign languages by himself, due to perhaps the fact that he dropped out of school at 12, and never recovered form the mental scar.

So Pelf , dear sis, I think juz sign up for Blogger la, or post comments in my other new blog ;) So sorry but I cannot take this guy's doodling anymore :P

To the joker, this is what I think of you la.My prediction ..

-You are a pathetic whore of a human who cannot get his dick up in bed
-Your mum gave you too little milk as a child coz her boobs were dried out from your dad sucking it too much, resulting in a severe oxygen deficiency.
-You earn too little to afford electricty, so you're probably posting this comments under your mum and dad's account.Or perhaps you're a 40 year old student?
-Your Japanese sucks, probably cause you post from a website , again due to your highly dyslexic state of mind, inability to learn new things, or that your brain is saturated with too much info, residual from your primary school years.
-Your dad's probably left your family for another woman, possibly a prostitute in Desker Road (meaning she is actually a he)
-You're just doing it to piss me off.How can I possibly get pissed off with my life like this now.
-I have your IP.Its a proxy address meaning you're probably posting this form your office, a cybercafe, college or the like.I also know you're from the North Selangor/KL area.One of your comments contained the words 'go and die' in it.So....if I were to lodge a police report against you, I wonder if any action is to be taken?
I'm Too comfortable with my life now to let a jackass like you bring my morale down.Too bad

OK, here's the deal, it ain't working.Why not go find some other blog to disturb la.How can anything I say possibly be pissing you off?Unless you're a Japanese who takes offence to my comments on Japanese porn stars (which I strongly doubt as your Japanese is actually worse than mine, and that in itself is a rarity) or Kerisamuddin himself whom I doubt has any time to surf my blog la.

The Dynamics of a Multiracial Society

The fabric of our society is so woven that a slight nitch would cause the whole cloth to unravel, leaving behind an unsightly mess that not even the impoverished Bangladeshis would want a piece of.

And yet nick and tug at this delicate artwork do they.Every politician , even the most green of them, would know that the quick route to boost their political mileage would be through appealing to the tribal instinct of man- that is the uncontrollable desire to stick to his own.Few see beyond this, even with all the hubbub of a united commune, unity under the banner ;).Some call it a pluralistic society.Others, national unity.Yet others, local names like Bangsa Malaysia.I call it-sheer hypocrisy.There is no such thing as, nor will there ever be , a fair society.We were born tribal.We were created segregated.So to me,fair society would be against the order of nature.But what we can do , is coexist in a brotherly way,that we can do, and in a society such as ours, we must.

There can be no true peace without justice, and no justice, without equality.Do not misquote or misunderstand me, this is not your usual racist chauvinistic banter.This is merely an observation, nonwithstanding, of not the racial divide, but the economic one.With all our wealth of resources, how is it that we keep paying the price of our leader's stupidity, arrogance and sometimes selfishness?

They go on and on about subsidies and ask the people to share their burden but are they really sharing our burden?When money is being basically poured down the well by imprudent spending.

At last, The PM has come forward and said race relations are at an all time low.Yea, this is so very true, where everyone sees everyone else through the color of their skin rather than their intellect, or capabilities.A Malay is unfairly labelled as government welfare case.An Indian is automatically seen as a gangster with no cash.A Sikh is automatically seen as a son of a security guard.A Chinese is instantly thought of as a businessman.Where the colour of your skin earns you a stereotype 'default setting' that includes economic capability,lineage,job choice,life expectancy and even cause of death.(i.e., oh that dude's Indian, he's sure to die of liver cirhossis, or heart attack, cause he takes lots of mutton curry and drinks like a fish)

People have summed you up at a glance.Usually this is not such a bad scenario, but of late some joker/clowns/morons of political background started talking.And then some other jokers starting talking some more.And the talking escalated to name calling, which deteriorated into a shouting match and now suddenly everyone is race-aware and suspicious of each other.

Well, my tuppence on this- destroy every race, religion and culture in this planet and label everyone 'World Citizen'

That way every damn war that goes down will be a Perang Saudara.

Is this True Love?

Could this be it, could she be the one?Its the question I've been asking myself for the last few days, since she first said 'Yes' 7 days ago.I mean I've had the gut feeling all this while, but never so strong, ever.

When I first asked my Ex out, it felt like I was putting it in all the work.It was this infatuation I had, and upon impulse perhaps, I acted upon it.For the next few months, it was like I was on this 'crusade' to get her.By the time she responded, the infatuation had already died down, and in the end I guess I was already cold and perhaps that was why it always felt like a one-sided affair....

But this, is much more than it.What started out as a crush,did not die a crush.It developed into a mesh , a hybrid of respect, admiration of character and attitude, a trusting friendship and a platonic thing, which eventually developed into a full blown thing.I guess one and a half years prepared me much more mentally and decisively to truly know a person and like her with whatever perceived flaws she thinks she has.I would like to think that if you like a person enough, flaws and weaknesses actually appear attractive rather than toothaches that needs to be tolerated.

Like I've told my current girl,I believe everything happens for a reason.And its the first time that a sharing of emotion was met with equal fervor on the other part, and when one things leads to another its a really beautiful thing :)

Not a feeling I am accustomed to, but I guess when you let your guard down, as what I believe is called a 'sweet surrender', to really let go of any reservations you might have and perhaps you get as much as you put in and it will be something beautiful.

And you might end up where I am =) extremely happy and waking up every morning wondering what great thing did I do right to deserve an amazing girl.My heart has never lied to me before,so I usually listen to what it tells me.And right now, its beat tells me , yes she is and yes it is.And the weird thing is, so does my mind.

Best Birthday By Far

Yea Ladies and Gentlemen.Or was it Men and Gentleladies?Whatever.Anyway, and so it came to pass that one Emmanuel Joseph was destined to live another year, despite of the tsunami, the American invasion of the Iraq, the Bird Flu, JE, Mad Cow disease, death threats with crooked, sharp traditional weapons held by crooked, sharp, traditional dudes with weapon in one hand, NEP Handbook in another and blaring microphone peppered with saliva infused with tobacco,sambal tumis,and venom spewing from a combination of fallen logic and an intense hatred for all things unlike that those which he is comfortable with, and other biological,chemical,psychological, emotional and spiritual crap thrown at him.

Now that coupled with a few good things such as euphoric career satisfaction, ecstatic newfound love life and a tightly bonded brotherhood of friends at work and outside work has capped this as easily my best birthday ever, as I have so much to be thankful to God for this year.A job.Wait, let me rephrase that, a great job. Opportunities to prove myself and people who trust me :) .A great girl to call my own.She's pretty, smart, hell of an independent person and yea, likes me for me.And thanks dear, for being the first to wish me ^ ^.

And so it came to pass that this Emmanuel had a bunch of great friends surrounding him and supporting him (I call them my bras - partially coz it rhymes with bros, and partially coz the main purpose of a bra is well, support)

Among these great friends of course were his friends at work, who though he is much more younger inexperienced and bound to make stupid mistakes and even more so make stupid statements at the absolutely wrong time (like pissing off a visiting manager) of course who kept wishing this guy Happy Birthday non stop through the night, some old primary school friends who despite me sometimes mixng their names up, never fail to wish me and some college friends as well.And some friends who sincerely call to wish me and ask me for the title of the Christmas song that goes 'On the first day of Christmas...' sigh....Wei Ida if you reading be careful lei, Jais might think I am trying to 'murtad'kan you by singing Christmas songs :P

His college buddies, Gerald, Francis (even though I suspect you were half drunk when you sent me a message 'Happy Birthday.Fark you.') and Vanessa and Azlina.

His blog friends, especially Pelf, whose e-card appeared in my inbox several times :P, His Friendster friends who probably even cannot remember who the hell I am and why I am on your Friendster list and out of pure guilt, resort to sending me a birthday message online, thanks as well it means a lot to me.And TGK for trying the best he could to join us at Redbox.

And yea last but not least my four closest buddies in the world.Myopic Lion,Milky Boy,Alcaholic Prawn and Lamp Post.You guys were there when I kena dump, when my laptop got carried away, when my car reversed into a lamp post, when I first won and lost in Genting, when I first liked this girl, when I was asking her out, the day she said yes.And I know you will be there on the day we either get married or (which I doubt) the time she one day heartlessly dumps me and I drive all the way to Tanjung Harapan with little regard to big cars and lorries around me and nearly miss death by a few cm away while crying on the phone.You guys rock.

And yea, spent my birthday pretty much swordfighting or banana gazing :P with those bros of mine, from karaokeing where no one seemed to like VSOP very much apart from Myopic Lion.And yea it was a good deal for less than 400 for all we did that night.Thanks.

And after that went up Genting , lost some money, came down, ate dinner with family where it marked three important things for me.1-for the first time in 22 years we did not go out and have some gwailo food.Which is good la coz I was getting sick of it anyway. 2- For the first time my dad called me a beer.Which is good coz previously he would wait for me to order myself and now I don't have to sneak back every time I get stoned. 3- For my birthday , my dad gave me a book on Learning Japanese.Well, he knows she is really into Japanese stuff and all, so its an important thing for me la.

Then got my last birthday greeting but from Nardev, my brilliant friend down from NTU Singapore.And so ends my wonderful day and end the day with a bang, when I learn that an issue that has been plaguing me the last few days at work has been more or less identified, which is of course the biggest step before a good resolution.And even bigger bang when she calls....and tells me....she would date me seriously.So that was a major morale upper.

With all this, God's been good to me this year around.Hope He continues to look favourably on this child of His.

Signing Off for Now,
Emmanuel Joseph(8.12.1983-current)

The Year That Was

Taking a look past this one year there was a lot of disturbing news pieces going around that would make your average Malaysian wonder whether this country is going to hell in a handbasket at the speed of teh tarik getting poured from one intergalactic mug to another intergalactic mug, in gravity zero, far, far away in space.

Here would be a fraction of our concerns, not neccesarily in chronological, and most definitely not in alphabetical order.

-The Lina Joy case
-The M Moorthy case
-Rising Fuel Prices
-The Takaful Story
-Wielding of Traditional Weapons
-What Appears to be Rising Race-Awareness
-Copyright Infringement
-Sibilin Church's Mass Destruction
-Felling of multiple places of worships throughout Malaysia
-Kg Berembang incident

And then you read more and more stupid things done with our money, and how this dude is corrupt and that dude is breaking the law and getting away with it.At the end of the day we're left wondering how did things get this way, and why we are still letting it slide.How can we ever stand by and watch state assembly morons compare building mega mansions, stealing state owned sand, demolishing temples,and being given huge land grants at the taxpayer's expense to placing a rack of BREAD on a SIDEWALK.WTF? Am I missing a point here?
They obviously missed out the Terbilang part of Pak Lah's motto, coz they sure as hell think we failed Math to let that one pass, and as bad as our education system is, I doubt people cannot do the math of this problem. Where 'without fear or favour' in the eyes of many state government directly translates to 'well, this guy has no connections in UMNO or MCA, so let's go for his ass first to cover our own and divert national attention to out scary finance situation'

And capitalism is not working properly when individuals are hugely rich and many states owe debts to Federal.

So the question remains- Has the government failed its people, or has the people failed its government?But enough about dwelling on polemics, we have the Gerakan Youth and Johor UMNO to constantly debate undebatable topics on our behalf.How was this year to me, ona personal basis?

Indeed I had been blessed this year and especially so this last weeks of the year.And I have none of the credit to take myself ,perhaps only to God for giving it to me.For even with the minor hiccups here and the occasional problem there, it was a beautiful year.And it ended on a high note, too.

For my close friends, and those who for some God-alone-knows-why reason occasionally hit on this blog, would notice the sudden increase in happy posts.You would also have noticed its been highly kudo-centric (kudomono-fruit in Japanese) nature of the posts largely owing to this latest um, interest of mine.And her responses thus far has had me full of that feeling you get when you know you're on the brink of something great and fulfilling, like after you've completed a major project that you know will earn you a spot on the corporate ladder.Or when you've baked this batch of perfect cookies and you get both the sense of fulfilment and anticipation all at once.Well, thats exactly how I feel at this point of time.

If I could describe this year as a roller coaster ride, I would say the deepest plunge started and ended in the beginning of the year and now its just the cool spinning parts, where you know what's going to happen, and just enjoy the ride anyway.

Life has dealt me a fair hand.Now its up to me to play it.