Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Future Malaysian Superheroes

In the likes of Keluang Man, Super Arang Man, and most recent- Cicakman! comes in the string of DC and Marvel 'celup' ripoffs comes a new generation of superheroes whose role seem to recede from that of a world saviour to stopping short of being the village idiot.

Here are some possible future 'superheroes' in Malaysia to be appearing cheap RM2 comic books and pirated VCDs nationwide..

Name: Katak Man

Basic Info: Some thing like Gamabunta from Naruto, only much smaller and presumably much more useless.And probably greener and slimier.

History:After falling into a giant beer vat in the Carlsberg factory in Shah Alam, beer factory worker M.K Periasamy saunters out with renewed vigour and zest and decides that he has a higher calling to preserve the frogs living near his house from imminent destruction in the hands of evil state executive councillors who are hell bent on building giant mansions without permits.He thus cuts his hand and tries to summon out Gamabunta but fails, so he goes to a Fun Custome Shop near his place and buys a frog suit.Convincing himself that he is in fact a giant frog in his past life, Periasamy goes in a lives with the frogs in a giant longkang near his house.Whenever any motorist passes by, Periasamy, assuming its some Indonesian workers who wants to build a mansion,he jumps out and scares the living daylights out of them.

Enemies:Other inhabitants of the longkang who keep wondering where this fugly frog came from and try their best to shoo him away by biting, stinging,poking and prodding him.

Name: Sampah Tong Man

Basic Info: Some sort of a poor man's Inspector Gadget

History: Former engineering,forensics and law honours student Pai Kia gets disheartened because his application to join the PDRM got rejected. It sounds normal, but so did his application to join Kastam, Imigresen, Jabatan Perikanan and MPK.So this dude wanders around and starts lepaking with some drug addicts in KL.He also starts eating garbage, quite literally.One day he gets this inspiration and using his engineering training to start building gadgets and weapons and even a car, affectionately known as the Lori Sampah.His first sign of recognition came where he brought down an entire gang of microchip-container-hijackers by pelting them with used milk cans.

Enemies:Flies, Cockroaches, rats and homeless people who think he is trying to steal their food and ruin their delicate ecosystem.

Name : Mad Rempit

Basic Info: Origins unknown (as he is believed to have forgotten his name as a result of smoking too much marijuana) , powers include Flying Bike, Noisy Bike, Wheelie and Hari Raya Fireworks (no one has actually seen him do a Fireworks, as it involves sacrificing himself by setting his bike on fire and ramming a police blockade)

History : It is widely believed that the guy riding bike registration number MAT 1, is the legendary Mad Rempit.Formerly a normal Mat Rempit, he was brought in under UMNO Youth's Mat Rempit Rehabilitation program.Unfortunately his mental state got screwed after he got beat up senseless by the police for wearing a keADILan T-shirt and badly bleeding, he ran to a nearby TGV that was showing 'Ghostrider'.He then decided that he was actually Ghostrider, went off sold his fortune to buy the license plate and modified his Kris 2 into some power packed bike that is totally not road-safe.Although not much danger to others, he sometimes throws rocks at policemen and once assaulted a stray cat because he thought it was staring at him.

Enemies: Road bullies, JPJ and PDRM.

...The End...

Feeling a little down as the girl is sick :-( Hopefully she feels better today .


Blogger devonic said...

At the same time, don't forget our present super heroes in Msia specially imported from a un-disclosed neighbour country...
The gang leader of Belacan gang..The Toyol Man...He has the power to elude normal human beings,to gather money at a faster rate than a farmer gathering his durian fruit,the power to do things in a very wrong way and yet blame it on others...But the best is he's a natural joker..Even looking at him will make you to laugh till your intestines blows apart...The list of his gangs goes a long way...The Zack in a sack man,the Kerisman,the Tak Boleh man and so it goes...

9:40 PM  
Blogger Emmanuel said...

LoL.Devonic, for both our sakes I sure hope as hell UMNO Youth does not read my blog :P

12:57 PM  
Blogger devonic said...

Don't worry..That's why I'm millions of mile away from those guys...And, those fellows don't even have time to read books, why mentioning blogs, as now they are busy reading those new budget coming to their 'cawangan' this month as it is rumoured..."3 juta bang...At last I can get that cicakman suit..." a voice heard saying in cawangan meeting...
And if they do come looking for you,just tell "saya dari seberang pak..."

5:05 PM  
Blogger Emmanuel said...

3 million can build the 'Cicak Cave' complete with attached skyroof and later claim they built it meant as a 'surau' or something.....

6:06 PM  
Blogger devonic said...

Why stop at sky roof...These guys can even play 'Seremban Stone' outer space (pity seremban folks,kena hentam for someone else)..Imagine what those super heroes can do right in the line of equator...Wondered why they never wanted to fly the 'wau' outer space...?

7:49 PM  
Blogger Emmanuel said...

zero gravity cannot fly stuff?or maybe they will test out Newton's laws as well. :P

7:40 AM  

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