My problem with Pondans etc
No I am not a overzealous self righteous ass of an Bible Thumper trying to destroy the evils of the world.I just seem to have a long standing problem with Pondans or Bapuks or whatever the hell they call themselves.Or rather it seems they seem to have a big problem with me.It is my personal belief that pondans throughout the country has this vendetta against I dunno, maybe Amber Chia or Angelina Jolie and they seem to want to take it out on people like me.Or maybe its just me.You judge.
Penang-I get harassed by a damn strong shemale as I leave a popular nightspot.Don't be fooled by their fake boobs, this bloody fools are strong like gorilla man.7 years of taekwondo is rendered useless actually.And why the fake female cannot take no I dunno.Thank God I escaped without anything lost, except my faith in humanity and a broken ego.However this I must relate to you.Someone who I shall not mention....tried to console me(I suffer from a bad case of OCD you see...and I was convinced that I had contracted some weird STD and my body immune system was the worst in the world and that I was going to die in 2 weeks)
Consoler Who shall not Be Named: Don't worry...cannot spread so easy.By the way, some time back, something similar to this happened.A guy got hit by a car, and his blood mingled with some dude with AIDS by accident.Some time later he suddenly died, then only they knew he had AIDS.
Now I may not have a degree in Freudian Science....but isn't this the exact thing you DON'T wanna tell a dude who has OCD and needs to be told he's gonna be all right!
So anyway,just to be sure I meet this doctor who after laughing his ass off, went something like this
Unethical Son of a Bitch Doctor Trying to Do Stand Up:So you studied Maths in Form 4 rite?
Depressed OCD Sufferer convinced he's gonna die: (Dalam hati:No you ass, I just bribed my way through SPM and proceeded to complete a degree)Err yes.
USOB:See, first the 'thing' needs to have an AIDS,and 'it' needs to have an open wound in the arm area where it grabbed you.And you need to have an open wound where it touched you, and blood would have needed to go in with a substantial amount before it can take any effect.
Less Depressed OCD Sufferer who knew that but needed Professional Opinion: Ah....so my chances to die is damn slim la?
USOB:Yes, in fact I can say 99.99% is nothing wrong with you.
Near my House- I stop to buy wantan mee at night , and lo and behold dari belakang kereta(these beings seem to like coming from the back) seekor muncul and started knocking my driver seat window.So....after Episode One: The Bapuk Menace, and all the bad memories, I ignited and sped off, in what little speed that can be offered by a malaysian car.Donating 3.00 to the wantan mee auntie.
In a chatroom- Even in cyberspace I am not spared!In mIRC- this 'chick' PMed me and started talking la...like normal ini la itu la....then at last under the guise of asking for my number in case she needed help with a college project(at this point in my mind I am still under the assumption it is a she.)
Later that night, I get a call.With a fucking eerie voice like a male trying to sound female.Try to imagine Louis Armstrong trying to sound like Charlotte Church.Needless to say of course...."I was not me, and she got the wrong number".
I'm gonna stare at a picture of Jessica Alba for a few days to cure the bad taste out of my mouth.