Saturday, August 27, 2005

Keng Yaik Won..and Proof my Friends are Animals.

...and it doesn't affect us in the least.Both his victory and Ka Ting's.In my own terms, 'takkan ada apa-apa yang berGerak-pun.'We're just going to have more spittle spewing forth from his mouth togather with bad English, horrible Malay and tonnes of salivated bacteria.So in other words, the people most hurt by this election results will not be any race community, nor be it the country, but most likely Sahabat Alam Malaysia or the Foot in Mouth Society.

That being said, let me reiterate that I have friends that are animals,to say in the least ... bad clowns crossed with rabies-infested dogs.Beasts with a sick sense of homour.What else explains 4 calls to your handset in the wee hours of the morning when you've spent the whole day walking up and down a 2.6 km port wharf????

Disclaimers: The names are withheld to protect them from eternal humiliation and me from getting my car window smashed.After all they are from Klang.

3.45 a.m- a creature called G calls, slurring. "Dei ....I am in Zouk, and I can hardly walk."
Note from me: Why the fuck would I want to know this at 4am?

4.00 a.m- a beast called S calls and slurs into his phone " should've come dei..ok...bye"
Note from me:I hope you burn in hell

...nvm at this point I have told them both NOT to call, and that I am sleeping, but when half your blood is composed of alcahol I suppose it affects comprehension and/or hearing.

4.12am - S,G,R and H; henceforth known as the Four Parias, calls and yell togather in drunken stupor - "Heeeyyy Emmanuel" and S, the beast picks up and drools into the phone "Dei don keling us ah dei....Last nite I dreamt of ***** dei...dei...Dei tomoro come ok...sett"

AND AT THIS POINT I could not sleep anymore la.Bitches.Fucking bitches.

Note from me: I really do not know what i said but it got him to put down the phone and at that point of time it felt like conquering Everest.

5.30am- G yelps into the phone - "dei we are at Sriga....come la turun and have breakfast".I clearly remember cursing him and heaping blessings in the form of every obscene word I could think of with every language I speak.

And well, if you're wondering why my phone is still switched on after call 1, its habitual.Plus one does not factor in barbaric friends in the thought process of turning on/off your phone!

And when I returned from work and called them, lo and behold, of course, they could not remember a thing.That did not prevent me from cursing them some more.Now I know why the Prophet Muhammad banned alcahol.


Anonymous Kerk Keng Yaik said...

Interesting isn't it..the old guard wins yet again i mean..after all this wat have we learnt dey. Yes we have learnt that the old gangland trio's still rule. Keng Yaik da man...

As for ur hewan friends, i suppose i grant u the permission to make em cry/wallow/do the suicidal jump. For the love of gawd they shud just walk in the street intoxicated wif alcohol only to realise they actually drank racun kutu babi...No more 4am callings then...

8:21 PM  
Blogger Emmanuel said...

Haha yeah man.

6:12 AM  
Blogger nawooz said...

it's a pity the Prophet did not ban stupidity. now...that would have been something! even better than splitting the oceans, i tell ya!

10:20 PM  
Blogger Emmanuel said...

hahaha-if we banned stupidity life would be too rigod- and no more wars,terrorism or crime.Now where is the fun in that.

9:56 AM  

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