Friday, April 28, 2006

Why it sucks being me.

Sure, I'm glad to be lucky in so many ways and I gotta thank God and all that jibber jabber bla bla, but then I cannot help but feel like I was born in the wrong age and the wrong time to the wrong parents in the wrong country sometimes.

Here's why.

1.By being Catholic, I am automatically a walking target to all major terrorist groups in the world.

2.By being mixed, I am automatically assumed to be Malay and have to puasa every Ramadan or get jailed. having white hair I am assumed to be old and people look at me funny when I go into a shop asking for a Naruto headband.

4.By working in a port people assume I know their small fart forwarding agency and stare at me in disbelief when I say I do not.

5.By being in IT people assume I own an IPOD,a 50 gig thumb drive hanging from my neck and a watch with Bluetooth capabilities.They refuse to accept that i run a 1.7G machine with no broadband and that I don't know how to work an IPOD.

6.By not being skinny people automatically assume I know where all the good food is.It sucks when the only food shop you know about in the area is a Burger King.

7.By liking video games people assume I am an avid gamer when I can't even kill a dead fat cow in Counterstrike 

8.By being from Penang, people assume I like assam laksa and curry fish head when I think Laksa looks like worms, and prefer not to have food that can look at me from beyond the grave while I eat.

Sigh.Someone hit me with a big rock.

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Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Satanic IRC channel

You wouldn't believe this......a Satanic IRC channel posting title yesterday when I drifted in... Check out the topic.Any Satanist care to comment?Mira...where are you dear?

Sunday, April 23, 2006

On Ugly Models and Pretty Secretaries

Sometimes I feel the Yin-Yang factor in this world is really imbalanced.Some people like is blessed with a fat gut and white hair, while others like Dawn Yang is blessed with drop dead gorgeous looks and no brains.But who needs brains when you have stunner good looks?

I mean who gives a rat's ass about earning a PhD or winning the Pullitzer when you can get everything you want just by flashing (a smile that is). Maybe its just me, but I note that models are getting uglier and secretaries are getting prettier.But hey, the world is a screwed up place.After all the best golfer is black, the best rapper is white and Chinatown is being run by Indonesians and Bangladeshis.

Still wouldn't it be great to be both beatiful AND smart.But the Yin-Yang factor forbids that.By law if you're ugly, you're smart.

If you look good you're dumb.If you look average, your brains are operating at 50% human capacity.And if by some fluke of nature you're smart and pretty, chances are you mati awal, probabaly hit by some sesat missile that was meant for some Abu Sayyaf camps.I still don't understand why America can shoot at wrong targets. Can't they get Google Satellite or something?Or can't they read maps?

Still I feel the Jews would make great models.If only they would la.So far the only jewish models i saw was in a mail forward from a collegue and they were in army fatigues.They're used to full loads so if you're smart, you're probably gonna shoot blanks, so get prepared la.

I think Japanese make lousy models simply coz they're short and their eyes look smaller than ikan bilis' eyes.I mean seriously only their comics have huge eye characters but in real life Japanese have slits so small for eyes, its amazing how they conquered half the world.

They must have heck of a good opthamologists.I mean to make so good glasses.Probably the americans can learn from them la, but maybe their still too busy looking for bombs in Afghanistan or Ethiopia, or maybe tommorow they might decide that there are weapons of mass destruction hidden in A Famosa waterworld, or that underneath the two towers in KLCC is actually two large Hang Tuah Missiles.

And that Teletubbies are evil.

Damn, I forgot the point I was trying to make with all this rambling.Oh well, there's alwez tommorow!


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Sunday, April 16, 2006

A Famosa Pics

Went to my company's Team building exercise in A Famosa Golf Resort, Malacca.Shortly put- it was a huge blast, more like a fun vacation than torture camp or anything.Since I bought that camera phone might as well put it into good use.

The main clubhouse where we ate and had syndicate exercises.Damn it sounds so much like a drug cartel activity.
Banana coaches: small and err, well small.
Exec's bungalow had its own private pool
.No pics of me swiming as I know most of you probably still need to eat hereafter.
Paintball aka where staff shoots you back for this years crap you gave them.Try and spot me.8 of 10 couldn't

Crossing the river using a raft.Think it was called Crimsom or Grissom or something.The river that is, not the color of it later, or the name of the investigating officer called in to aid the coroner.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Good Friday (For Catholics)

People should not be afraid of their faith.Nor should they be ashamed of it.They should declare it proudly, proud of belonging to adherents of a unique discpline, proud to be defenders of rites and rituals of that religion.Proud to be mouthpieces of that religion's messengers, proud to be part of a long lineage of saints and holy men and women born and forged out of that religion.

Proud to be with God's side.

There are too many things to fight in the world today that we cannot afford to fight amongst ourselves.That being said, I am guilty of it as well.I'm proud to be Catholic, but do I always show it?

Guilty of trying to be agreeable with others, rather than being right.

Guilty of concealment as opposed to proclamation.

Guilty of sin rather than exemplary living.

Just wanted to share this with Catholics reading- the Stabat Mater usually sung with Mary's Way of the Cross.I found it milder but more emotionally moving than the traditional way of the cross.

Stabat Mater dolorosa
juxta crucem lacrymosa
dum pendebat Filius.

The mother was standing full of sorrow, weeping near the cross, while on it her son was hanging.

Cuius aninam gementem,
contristatam ac dolentem
pertransivit gladius.

A sword pierced her sighing soul, saddened and suffering.

O quam tristis et afflicta
fuit illa benedicta
Mater Unigeniti!

Oh how sad and afflicted was that blessed one, the Mother of the Only Begotten!

Quae moerebat et dolebat
Pia Mater, dum videbat
Nati poenas inclyti.

The virtuous mother was lamenting and grieving, while she saw the punishments of her glorious Son.

Quis est homo qui non fleret
Matrem Christi si videret
in tanto supplicio?

Who is there who would not weep to see the Mother of Christ in such torture?

Quis non posset contristari,
Matrem Christi contemplari
dolentem cum Filio?

Who cannot be saddened, to contemplate the Mother of Christ grieving with her Son?

Pro peccatis suae gentis
vidit Jesum in tormentis
et flagellis subditum.

For the sins of his people, she saw Jesus placed in torments and scourges.

Vidit suum dulcem Natum
morientem desolatum
dum emisit spiritum.

She saw her sweet Son dying desolate while he sent forth his spirit.

Eia Mater, fons amoris,
me sentire vim doloris,
fac, ut tecum lugeam.

Ah Mother, fountain of love, make me feel the force of your sorrow, so that I may mourn with you.

Fac ut ardeat cor meum
in amando Christum Deum,
ut sibi complaceam.

Make my heart be on fire in loving Christ, my God, so that I may please him also.

Sancta Mater, istud agas,
crucifixi figi plagas
cordi meo valide.

Holy Mother, do that, fix strongly on my heart the wounds of the Crucified One.

Tui Nati vulnerati,
tam dignati pro me pati,
poenas mecum divide.

Share with me the punishments of your wounded Son who so deigned to suffer for me.

Fac me tecum vere flere,
crucifixo condolere,
donec ego vixero.

Make me truly weep with you, to suffer with the Crucified One, as long as I shall live.

Juxta crucem tecum stare,
te libenter sociare
in planctu desidero.

I wish to stand near the cross with you, to share willingly in the lamentation.

Virgo virginum praeclara,
mihi iam non sis amara:
fac me tecum plangere.

Distinguished virgin of virgins, be not bitter to me now: let me grieve with you.

Fac ut portem Christi mortem,
passionis fac consortem
et plagas recollere.

Make me bear the death of Christ, make me be a sharer of his passion and recollect his blows.

Fac me plagis vulnerari,
cruce hac inebriari
ob amorem Filii.

Make me wounded with the blows, to be inebriated by this cross because of love of the Son.

Inflammatus et accensus,
per te, Virgo, sim defensus
in die iudicii.

Kindled and inflamed for you, Virgin, may I be defended on the day of judgment.

Christe, cum sit hunc exire,
da per Matrem me venire
ad palmam victoriae.

Christ, when I must go hence, let me come for the sake of Your Mother to the palm of victory.

Quando corpus morietur,
fac ut animae donetur,
paradisi gloria.

When my body dies, grant that the glory of paradise be given to my soul. Amen!


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Saturday, April 01, 2006

The Dark Side

Yes folks....I am succumbing to the Dark Side of Executiveness.This is what happens when you migle too much with people who think alike.

To the uninitiated(read: those who have no idea who in bright blue hell am i) you should know that I am (read: was) once hell bent on the great ideas found by that Japanese Hawaiian sumo dude called Kiyosaki (author of Rich Dad Poor Dad and his lesser known work, Bitch Mum Poor Kid)

In its simplest form, Kiyosaki tells us to starve ourselves, deny ourselves basic toilet neccessities and go live under a bridge for 15 years while saving your salary so when your bank account grows really really huge, you can buy yourself a Mercedes, a large house, and you will on average have 7 days to enjoy it before Income Tax Dept comes and take it all away pending a 20 year court battle in which your family will leave you, your friends abandon you, and you end up where you came from, living under a bridge(Klang Bridge is not bad, it has a view and some nice sampans too roam around with)

On the other hand, you have what is called credit, whereby you live on the bank's money.There, you basically dig a hole of debt and keep digging till you die, then your EPF money and insurance covers the balance after you die.If you somehow happen to be lucky enough to make it to the top and buy one or two houses, then your EPF money can be used for more self-serving needs, like paying for your kids education and leaving just enough for you and the wife to take that long deserved vacation trip to Port Dickson.

Anyway ladies and gentlemen for better or worse, I am announcing my decision to descend into Fake Execism where I made my first move last week buying a phone I can't really afford by Kiyosaki's definition, or buy Fake Execism definition, a cheap entry level 3G phone.It set me back about 1.5k(separuh gaji) and has left me eating sand for the rest of the month.Worse still, it has gotten me into considering buying a new car, a Playstation , new sound system and home theater and new air conditioning for my room(which of course, will then be known as My Cozy Crib thereafter).

Plus SooSoo , Chin Leong and me went to Melaka for the weekend and planning to go to more places over the next weekends.This, added with the upcoming two company trips to Phuket and all kinda makes me feel more 'Fake-Execy'

And so the Ring has come to me....muahahahhahaha

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